We’ve all met that person who has been ‘going to write a memoir’ for fifteen years. Maybe you’re that person.

You may have a folder of old photographs, a box of letters, some stories everyone in the family is tired of hearing.

The problem is usually not a lack of stories. It’s the idea of the story.

A whole life. Where do you even begin?

If you’re thinking of writing your memoir, read on for some tips on how to get through the most challenging part: getting started.

Start with Tuesday

Our advice is to forget, for now, that you’re writing a memoir. Write about one thing you remember. The afternoon you got caught in a storm walking home from school. The time your grandmother did something out of character. The moment you knew you had to change careers.

Big or small doesn’t matter. Actually, small is usually better. But start to fill in that blank page. Give yourself 500 words, or 200. Nobody’s checking.

Get specific

There’s a natural tendency to summarise the past. ‘Every summer we went to Rosebud.’

Fine, but it gets interesting when you take us to one of those summers. Which house? Who was there? What could you smell? What did everyone fight about in the car?

The odd little details make a story feel real, and what was ordinary to you may be fascinating to someone else.

Raid the cupboards

If your memory is being uncooperative, give it some help. Look through photographs, letters, diaries, school reports, postcards, recipes and the mysterious objects you’ve carted from house to house.

Ask yourself, why did we keep this?

One memory tends to loosen another. Write them down and don’t worry about what it means.

Forget the big picture

An excellent way to never start is to decide your memoir needs a theme, structure and profound message before you begin writing.

Write a handful of self-contained memories first. They don’t have to be chronological or connected. Over time, patterns emerge: people, places, decisions and turning points keep coming back.

Eventually, you may realise you’re not writing about what you thought you were writing about. That’s where the interesting book is hiding!

Sound like you

Please don’t try to sound like a writer. You already have a voice; use that one.

Write the way you would tell the story to someone across the table.

There will be time later to edit, research and argue with your brother about what actually happened. For now, start with one memory.

Or – let us help you find it

Hyphen has spent years interviewing people, digging through archives and finding the stories hidden inside a lifetime of memories. Through our memoir and business biography imprint, our writers, editors and designers can help at any stage – from finding the story to printing the finished book.